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Go to water parks early - 07/07/2008

On Saturday July 5th, Lauren and I went to Kentucky Kingdom's Hurricane Bay or whatever it's called now. Splash Mountain maybe? Anyway, I had an epiphany while I was there. Call me snobby if you want, but it was one of the only times I couldn't stand to be around people any longer.  I felt like I was thrown into a world of people that had never given their kids a lesson in manners, bathing, or public etiquette and conduct. Born in Ohio, I moved to KY at a relatively early age and always considered myself to be a true Kentucky boy. I still love Kentucky and everything about it, but I started recognizing the Kentucky stereotypes

There were two particular moments that made me just look back in awe. 

1. Lauren and I were waiting in line for a water slide when a kid, perhaps 10 years old, (we could tell he had ADHD or some sort of disability) tried to get by the couple behind us by saying "Excuse Me". This couple must have spotted him from afar because the lady asked, "Is your Mom up there?" and the kid just stood there silent. 


Let me take you about 30 minutes prior when Lauren and I were standing in line at a different slide and this same kid was in front of us with his Grandma and had no problem speaking his mind.  He was as hyper as any kid would be at the water park and more...

She asked again, "Do you have a guardian up there?" and the kid stood silent.  She could tell this kid was trying to cut line so she explained to him that he just had to wait his turn.  The lady turned to me and I said, "Good job, I'm glad you said something to him." We joked about it for a few seconds and then out of the corner of our eye we saw the kid hit this lady's husband on the arm.  Ohh man it was on.  This lady got in this kids face and said, "That's it! When we go down this slide you are to not leave my sight and we are going to have a talk with your mother!" Lauren and I were in shock because we have no experience in disciplining a child. The boy was scared out of his mind and turned around and made a quick dart down the stairs.  The lady turned back to Lauren and I and said in a stern voice, "You never mess with a teacher during the summer time."

2. While in the same line for the water slide there were 2 couples in a different line.  These 4 were out from the cutt. Having a combined weight of atleast 2 Asian elephants.  This might have been the grossest thing I have ever witnessed, atleast in public.  The girls were behind their boyfriends and they were each taking turns popping pimples on their boyfriends backs and necks. Ya I know, its sickening isn't it? All I wanted to do was say something, but seeing as how the guys could sit on me, and there isn't much room to run when you are on stairs waiting for a slide, I declined to speak. All I wanted to do was run home and shower as fast as I could because I had to share the same pool area with these folks.

Lauren made a good point to me after all of this. Outside of my group of friends and the people I know, this is how the 'rest' of the populous acts. I felt like I was blind to my surroundings because I had never noticed before. I have always associated 'Kentucky southern' with proper manners, a little bit of sophistication (Keeneland), and some of the best looking women in the country. Don't get me wrong, I still regard Kentucky as a great place, but seeing mass amounts of the same crap that parents should be teaching their kids all day made me realize how much work my parents did raising me. After witnessing some of the events that day, I want to be just as good as my Father when I raise my children. I want to be able to give my kids a sense of appreciation that takes 25 years to realize.

 What am I taking away from this experience...go to Six Flags before the nastys get there and make you want to start hating your fellow man.

 Sorry I don't have any pictures of the stories from above, but use your imagination.  Here are some pics from some of the better moments of the day.

On top of the ferris wheel

About ever 15 minutes there would be a horn that would go off by the kiddie park.  After the horn blows you have about 5 seconds to run in stand in under the big green bucket that dumps a bunch of water down (probably mostly pee).  You can see the bucket above my head in the picture above.  I made it my goal at the end of the day to run and get under the bucket while all the little kids were around me.  This is my attempt.